Thursday, July 27, 2006
Oddball cravings... no, I'm not preggers
It's 9:30 in the morning and I'm craving cashew chicken with veggie fried rice from the local Chinese joint.... what gives? :)
Posted JDaaris @
10:24 AM ::
4 chocolate drops
Gimme some chocolate!
Friday, July 21, 2006
What would you do???
Here's the deal...
You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed. On your right side is a sharp drop-off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the Kangaroo.
What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
If you do not know, see answer below.
Get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round!
Posted JDaaris @
3:13 AM ::
2 chocolate drops
Gimme some chocolate!
Friday, July 14, 2006
Can you believe "they walk among us?"
Got this in an e-mail, hadda share; I know it will appeal to yall :).. my fave is the airline luggage...
Subject: They walk among Us
Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it." For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too un-trusting of this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50." The next day someone stole it.
Caution... They Walk Among Us!
====================
One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted...."Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said..."where???" They Walk among us!!
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While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff." They Walk Among Us!!
====================
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . . They Walk Among Us!!!
====================
My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving". They Walk Among Us!!!!
====================
My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk... They Walk Among Us!!!!!
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My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10 % and gave us a 20% discount.... They Walk Among Us!!!!!!
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I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained t hat a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned...
They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!
====================
I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"... They Walk Among Us!!!!!!!!
====================
While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.
They walk among us, AND reproduce!
Posted JDaaris @
6:07 AM ::
2 chocolate drops
Gimme some chocolate!
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Sock hop, you in?
Hi all. This will be brief...
I got a "sock hop" letter from my sister yesterday.. sounds like fun to me, but then I realized I don't have six friends.. pathetic, eh? Anyway, this is the deal. I mail a pair of funky socks to the top name and address on the letter sent to me, then add my name and address at the bottom. I send out six of these letters. At some point, I will end up with 36 pairs of socks from goodness knows where... I like to wear funky, funny socks with my sneaks, and this sounds like a hoot to me. Anybody on here want to be included? You'll hafta e-mail me or we'll hafta figure out a way to communicate with one another. Lemme know by Friday afternoon.
I can't believe I don't even have six friends... that was probably a realization I didn't need to know.
Posted JDaaris @
8:19 AM ::
4 chocolate drops
Gimme some chocolate!
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