Sunday, March 12, 2006
I thought these were funny, sharing 'em wid ya
Jenn (Chihuahua Lover) gets full credit for these; thought they were well worth sharing, in case you need a smile...:
NUDITY
I was driving with my three young
children one warm summer evening when
A woman in the convertible ahead of us
stood up and waved. She was stark naked !
As I was reeling from the shock,
I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat,
"Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!
HONESTY
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom
to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush
in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it
in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment,
then ran to my bathroom and came out with my
toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming
little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, '
cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.
OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed
his teacher a Note from his mother.
The note read,
"The opinions expressed by this child are
Not necessarily those of his parents."
KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup
to come out of the jar.
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked
her 4-year-old daughter to Answer the phone.
"It's the minister, Mommy," the child said to her mother.
Then she added, "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."
MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found
himself in the women's Locker room.
When he was spotted, the room burst
into shrieks, with ladies
Grabbing towels and running for cover.
The little boy watched in amazement and Then asked,
"What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
ELDERLY
While working for an organization that
delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins,
I used to take my 4-year-old daughter
on my afternoon rounds.
The various appliances of old age,
particularly the canes, walkers and
wheelchairs unfailingly intrigued her.
One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth
soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the
inevitable barrage of questions,
she merely turned and whispered,
"The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
DRESS UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party.
When she saw Her dad donning his tuxedo,
she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache
the next morning."
SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school.
"I'm just Wasting my time," she said to her mother.
"I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"
BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible.
He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.
Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible.
He Picked up the object and looked at it.
What ! he saw was an old leaf that had
Been pressed in between the pages.
"Mama, look what I found", the boy called out."
What have you got there, dear?"
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered,
"I think it's Adam's underwear."
Posted JDaaris @
4:07 PM ::
9 chocolate drops
Gimme some chocolate!
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